BFN#8

13DPO and counting...

Thursday Trina's temp took a major dip and my mood dipped with it.  That night a spot of blood. We cried and held each other and mourned another cycle's passing us by. Friday, to my great surprise, her temp jumped back up and brought with it a bloodless day. What is this? A tease? A fluke? This morning brought another high temp. I'm not sure what to think. I'd already accepted this BFN and now hope is edging in. I'm doing my best to tell myself that reaching 13DPO nearly free of blood and low temps is the work of progesterone alone and not our elusive BFP. Tomorrow we test. I can't even explain the ball of anxiety I'm carrying around in my gut today. Is there a light at the end of this tunnel or is that just headlamp of the BFN train headed my way? 

10 days & Waiting...

The first week of our 8th TWW flew by without a second thought on my part. This second week is dragging by at a speed I can only assume defies the laws of time itself. Somewhere along the line, Trina and I have let ourselves move from being shoulder shrugging "we'll see" to cautiously optimistic "just maybe..." to down right giddy "we're totally pregnant". Here are a few things that have led us down this happy but possibly soul shatteringly wrong path. She's had nausea and mood swings for 4 days. The last 2 days her BBT has risen, leaving us the beginnings of a triphasic chart. Thurs she bought 5 lemons and 5 limes out of the blue because she REALLY needed something sour and yesterday her boobs started to hurt. I'm aware that all of the aforementioned "pregnancy symptoms" can be explained away by progesterone supplementation and PMS, but it sure has been fun to dream. 

Trifecta

Trina has EWCM, ferny spit & a smiling ovulation stick. It's time. :)

BFN#7

Spotting on 10 DPO

Trina had some spotting tonight. The pessimist in me thinks it's probably just an early start to her period, but the little bit of optimism I have is hoping it's implantation spotting. As of yesterday her temperature hadn't dipped in the least. Unfortunately our power blinked last night so her BBT alarm didn't go off resulting in today's temperature being unknown. Kind of frustrating, but we'll have answers in the morning. I haven't had a ton of hope for this cycle and my expectation has dropped even lower these last few days as Trina's PMS symptoms have reared their ugly head but, as always, a glimmer of hope remains. Here's to high mercury come sun up.

A few days ago my very good friends found out they are having twin boys so we spent over an hour picking out cute baby things to fill a congratulations basket. It was bittersweet, as always, to shop for someone else's babies. We did enjoy seeing all of the "new & improved" selections that are now available for our future baby. It was fun to pick things out for "when we get pregnant". It was nice to daydream. 

For those of you who are planning to see the new Plxar film Up, let me warn you that Trina cried through the first 15 minutes of it. This is partly because of her hormones and partly because we were blindsided with the topics of infertility and death. It was a really good movie, we just weren't prepared for the subject matter to be so deep a few minutes in. After the initial punch in the gut, the rest of the show is fun and carefree for the most part. 

Pincushions and Change of Plans

Wed Trina had her first acupuncture appointment. Everything went pretty well considering she's a hardcore needlephobe. :) She had some anxiety and a few waves of dizziness, but made it through. She was exhausted for the rest of the day. Our acupuncturist was great. She took a very detailed patient history and commented on some of the very things I've brought up to my OB only to have him dismiss them as trivial or nonexistent. I'm really glad we went and am starting to regret not going sooner in our TTC journey. Live and learn.

At our last post-BFN OB visit, our Doc said he'd like to do a follicle scan and possible trigger shot this cycle. I'm all for the scan, but don't think the trigger is necessary. We'll see. After counting days we realized that Memorial Day would interfere with the timing. Our ovulation would most likely coincide with their 4 day weekend. Ah well, after some discussion we decided to take a break this cycle. That way, we would have 4 acupuncture appointments under our belt, save a little money to pay for the scan and be ready to go next cycle. Well... After a few days Trina started getting really sad about being on a break so we compromised and got one vial. This cycle has no Cl0mid, one acupuncture appt and only one ICI. Here's rooting for the underdog. :)