Sunday, May 10, 2009

I was going to tell you 'Happy Mother's Day' but you're not a mother.

This from my coworker today, just as my day was kicking off to an awesome start. I started my period today. Someone really has a sense of humor to give a gal TTC her period on Mother's Day. This is Trina by the way. I don't remember how to log in to my own sign in name. I'm just so frustrated with talking to people who have no clue what this is like. So many times, I've heard, "Well, if you can't get pregnant, you can still adopt" or, "You can just let Robbie birth the children." People have no idea how important the actual experiences of pregnancy and birth are to me. Am I really the only one who feels so strongly about this, or is it just that they were 16 and didn't have to try for a year or more to make babies? And seriously, if one more person tells me I look pregnant because I've gained so much weight, I'm gonna hurt them.

So, I know I generally leave the blogging to Robbie. She's waaaaaay funnier. Plus, I've been feeling pretty negative. Not much fun to read. But Robbie keeps telling me I need to talk to people who have empathy, and not the idiots I work with who seem to enjoy hurting me. So here I am.

Happy Mother's Day to those of you this applies to. The rest of you, I'm feeling your pain.

12 comments:

N said...

Doesn't matter if you're fun or not - it's your safe place, and we're here for you.

And I want to kick your co-worker in the face. They've obviously never had trouble getting pregnant, or experienced loss. Ass.

You are a mother. Just missing the baby. *hugs*

Jen said...

I agree. This is your space to write, vent, scream, whatever...we are here for you! I literally don't know how I would have survived the last 16 months without blogging, so maybe you should blog more! It is free therapy.

I would have told your co-worker to bite me, so you are a better woman than I. I feel the exact same way as you--I have an urge to birth a child and be a mother so I can empathize with you. You are not alone. Here's to us being mom's next May!

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry about you coworker, what a miserable person!

Sending good thoughts to you.

amyjay said...

I get it! It's amazing how insensitive people can be. Here's to renewed hope for a new cycle.

thebao said...

man, people are clueless. or really mean. either way, LAME!
also, I totally agree with the other commenters here--this blog is not about the writer entertaining the readers; it's about you getting the support you need.

j.k-c. said...

People can be so insensitive out there in the world. You are allowed to vent here about all the hurt and pain. Take care of yourself!

2momswithaplan said...

Ok... I would have slapped someone... seriously!

Mother's day was hard on us too... but it makes me feel better to know that we will all be mothers one day... when that time is right.

Don't concern yourself with the idiots of the world. The only person you should be worried about is you and Robbie. You two are in this together. :)

We are all like minded women, so feel free to come back anytime to vent if that's what you need! We're here for you!

fruitlooped said...

Your co-worker is a total asshole! I agree with everyones elses comments too - this blog is your refuge from the crap and disappointment of TTC. (((hugs)))

KraftyKay said...

Oh my, what an insensitive coworker! I'm so sorry someone would say that to you.

Courtney said...

i think you should get on here and write more, its nice to hear both sides and both points of view. trina i know you will make an amazing mother one day, dont give up and keep you head high. as for insensitive people like your co-worker just ignore it, i know its hard but its the best thing to do. they dont understand and i doubt they'd even care to understand. all that matters are the people close to you that help you and make you happy along the way. i know we aren't the closest but like i've told robbie, im here for both of you anytime and day. i care about you both greatly and i look up to y'all and have much to respect for you two. i wish y'all the best of luck next time. see you tuesday =)

reproducinggenius said...

What an absolute CRAP thing for your co-worker to say. You're a childless mom, and one of these days, you'll be a mom with her baby, but no one should be so insensitive as to tell you you aren't a mother. I know that pain--we experienced comments like these too--and they're just miserable.

I'm glad to see you blogging. It does help, especially during these more difficult times. We're all here to hold your hand through it all.

EMILY!!!! said...

I LOVE YOU AND YOU ARE BEAUTIFULLY GORGEOUS WOMAN!!! Although i cant say i feel your pain, it does still kill me seein you and robbie in the pain cuz i lovers you ladies a lot a lot! SO i decided we will have an INCREDIBLE time at schliterbahn and it will be amazing and we will be in pain from getting sunburned but it will be so worth it! It'll be good to spend some carefree time frolicking around at the water park :) we need to spend more time together cause this ONCE A WEEK thing is LAME