Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Passing Time In The TWW

Still not exactly sure what cause the "reaction" to this IUI, but Trina is slowly starting to feel better. She's still cramping off & on, has some pinkish discharge and is very tender, though. Against my advice, she decided to go to work on Tues. Unfortunately, when she was getting ready for her shift, she realized that her abdomen was still too tender for her to button her baggiest pants. Luckily, the first time we were pregnant she bought a Be11a Band on a whim. She put it on to hold up her britches with slightly less pain than trying to button up. 

Feb 9th marks the end of our TWW. To make time fly, we decided to steal, then morph the "question a day" idea from our fellow bloggers. Instead of you suggesting questions for us to answer, we're going to ask a question to be answered by you. We'll answer it ourselves as well. That way we can all get to know each other a little better. 

Question #1:
What, if any, non-medical practices do you take part in to help nudge your TTC journey towards a favorable end? These can be good luck charms, religious or superstitious rituals, basically anything symbolic that you find yourself doing to tip the scale in your favor.

Our Answer:
This is kind of a funny thing for us. Neither of us think of ourselves as religious or superstitious in any way,  but I've noticed that we have been adhering to certain practices because, frankly, it can't hurt and it's kind of fun. I attribute our behavior to how completely useless we tend to feel with this whole ordeal. We do everything right in the way of nutrition and timing and fertility meds, but really, it comes down to a point where there isn't a thing we can do. That being said, here's what we've been guilty of doing just in case it helps.

At the first two IUI's, Trina wore a "tree t-shirt" that she had. The tree symbolizes life and family to us so it just seemed to fit. For Xmas following our miscarriage, I bought Trina a new tree t-shirt to wear to our future IUI's. I thought that a fresh t-shirt for our fresh start would be nice, but I now realize it may also be that I wanted one that wasn't tainted by our earlier tries and subsequent heartbreak. 

For the due date of our little lost one, I bought Trina and myself matching fertility/pregnancy necklaces from LaBelleDame. I haven't taken mine off. Not once, not to shower, not to wear another necklace, not for anything. The strange part is that I wear it inside my shirt. No one knows it's there but me.  I actually figured this out when someone commented on how pretty it was and I immediately said "Oh, I didn't realize it was out" and tucked it away. How strange that I was keeping a subconscious secret.

Thirdly, when we were visiting the Tx Ren Faire this year we came across a vendor selling necklaces with vials of scented oils and 2 charms hanging off them. We thought that they'd be cute air fresheners for our new cars. Hers has a tree charm and a fertility goddess charm, mine has a sea turtle charm (a symbol of our marriage) and a fertility goddess charm. Hard to miss the theme there, Marriage-Fertility-Family. At least this one was done consciously and in a fun way. :)


tui said...

I like this idea very much :)

We have been through MANY rituals, most just out of fun but some with a bit more serious intent I guess. Our first 2 IUIs K kept a piece of amethyst close to her for a day or two prior, then I held it during the IUI. This was from her sister who is very into feng shui and believes it helps with fertility. Since then we've done the pineapple, egg mcmuffin, fish oil tablets - man I'm sure I'm missing some things! I guess it's partly about trying to get some sense of control. I feel like we're kind of over that now, but who knows what we'll do next time :)

Also wanted to tell you that you wearing your necklace under your shirt is quite similar to a NZ Maori custom. It's quite common for Maori (and other kiwis now) to wear a bone or pounamu (greenstone) carving around their neck. Most people wear it under their shirt and close to their skin as it is a Taonga (treasure) and the wearing of it is something meaningful to the wearer - not necessarily a fashion accessory. Nor is it to be taken off for any reason - it's considered very bad luck and if it does come off for any reason, it is meant to stay off for good. It's interesting that you seem to have the same instinct!

welcome2ourworld said...

As we can't do a IUI at a doctor here in Germany (it's against the law) we do it "by ourselves" at home with a known donor. For that I am wearing a "Superman"-T-Shirt :) You know - the "S"-Symbol Superman wears on his chest...well...we say the "S" stands for "Sperm-Shirt" *lol*. It's to support the "Swimmers" or the "Sperm". It's abolutely silly but we have fun everytime I put it on. We don't want to be too "stiff" about this whole process. We are trying to have a baby - that's a wonderful thing. And a little bit fun can't hurt :)

2momswithaplan said...

Great idea and I hope your TWW goes by quickly!

I totally understand the lack of control during the tww. You prepare, temp, drink fertilty tea, and then stand on your head for 45 minutes - then you wait. With no control of the wait or what's happening... the only thing you can do is eat pineapple and sunflower seeds in hopes that fertilized egg will stick.

We really don't have any rituals. We just do the dirty deed and hope for the best. lol Not very exciting... I know.

Anonymous said...

i've given up on rituals. we used to have lots of them, but as the months have passed, we've slowly abandoned them...

i love your necklace, its beautiful. i bought a necklace after my miscarriage too (a pearl, since i was due in june). i wear it every single day.

Anonymous said...

I've got my fingers crossed for you. And us. We have lately been trying to not think about it too much and just BE. I think part of it is that we can't keep getting so stressed and we are trying to "let it happen" as closely as it can be done when we have to plan so hard.

Anonymous said...

We didn't do anything special. Just did it and on weekends, treated ourselves to a nice breakfast out afterwards.

KraftyKay said...

We did at-home IUIs and I would lay down for a 1/2 hour or so afterwards thinking intently about sperm meeting egg while my partner rubbed my stomach and said encouraging words (i.e. "swim, little guys, swim!).

I don't know if this one counts since I only did it once, but the month I conceived I ate brazil nuts and pineapple halfway through the TWW.

Fingers crossed for you!

Anonymous said...

Good luck ladies!
We don't have any rituals, really. We do some visualizations to relax us and try to invite our babe into our lives. I also wear my wife's underwear on insemination days. I know, tmi =)

Anonymous said...

This is a great idea! Maybe you will let me steal it on one of my twws?

Sadly I have abandoned rituals that I started when we first began ttc. Nothing seemed to pay off you know? I used to take 16 herb and supplement pills each day as prescribed by the acupuncturist but I can't keep it up. I rarely go for acupuncture anymore either.

I don't really have anything else I do other than try to be calm, positive and visualize a successful pregnancy. I take my prenatals and try to keep my sanity.